I have had two abortions, one miscarriage, and one baby. When I was 13, I was raped and my family wouldn’t allow an abortion. I was forced to then give the baby up for adoption. At 16 I was assaulted by my boyfriend, and when I found out that I was pregnant he made sure that I wasn’t anymore. At 17 I got pregnant again, and I knew I wasn’t strong enough to get away from my abusive boyfriend and that he had decided he wanted a baby. I just couldn’t let that happen. I talked to a local clinic and they arranged for me to have an abortion and I went. There were a few protestors, but that didn’t bother me. The actual abortion itself wasn’t painful for me the worst part was the vacuum sound. I never even told him. After some time, I left and managed to steer clear from him, but at 19 I found myself pregnant and alone.
I had just started a new relationship but was pregnant from a previous encounter. After just getting my life on track, I couldn’t imagine keeping this baby. My doctor said that I needed to think about myself and where my life was going and my partner was supportive she said that she would respect my decision either way. I decided that I needed to terminate the pregnancy and get myself together. This second abortion was comfortable in that the people involved were kind and informed. There were no protestors at this clinic and no one looked down on me for my decision. I don’t regret either abortion I did what I needed to help myself.
My partner and I have been together for 4 years and going strong. I can’t imagine bringing a child into an abusive situation and subjecting them to the same type of childhood I had when I could barely keep myself together. If I had kept all of these children I would be a mother with 4 children from 12 to 6 and only 26 myself. Three of the four children would have been from an assault. I am glad that I had abortion as an option and that it was a right I could have. I only wish is that at 13 I could have made the decision to have an abortion without having others decide for me. I can imagine the fear women had before legal safe abortions. No one should have the right to say that I must have a child because I am pregnant. I am eternally grateful to the women before me who fought for my rights. Some people say if you have children now what will you tell them. I say that I will tell them that I made a decision that allowed me to come to a place in my life were I am not being abused and a place were I can have a child from love and not force.
This is my story…