Hello, my name is Monica and after reading stories at INS for a while now, I thought that I would post mine. I feel that my story is unique in that I have experienced raising children and adoption and still choose abortion, I hope that it will be posted and help others with their decision.
When I was 14 I found out that I was pregnant with my boyfriend’s (he was 18) child. My boyfriend was controlling and abusive, I didn’t know how to handle a pregnancy, so I hid it. I was 29 weeks when by complications with the pregnancy (and my boyfriend) I went into premature labor. She was born that night, and when my parents found out it was decided for me that she would be put up for adoption. That was not my choice, but out of a lack of knowledge I agreed and daily regret that decision even though I know it was for the best.
After my daughter I was religious about birth control and tried to use condoms regularly. Unfortunately we found out a just recently that my body doesn’t process hormonal birth control normally, and instead I am easily impregnated. My first son was born when I was 16, my second 18. I do not regret the choices that I made to carry my pregnancies to term, they were my choice, and although life has been difficult, my boys are my life.
When I was 19 I married my boys’ father, and it was my wedding day that my period was due. I figured that it was late due to the stress of the wedding, but 5 days later when I took a home pregnancy test, my fears were affirmed. I love children and someday want more, but I had an 18 month old and 3 year old to think about, this was not the time. As selfish as it sounds, I was happy at my job, and happy with my body. I just didn’t want that baby at that time.
So my husband came to the clinic with me. All I remember walking up to the clinic is wondering if it was the right place. There were no protestors outside, it was in the middle of a busy downtown area, and nobody looked twice at us entering the building. Going inside I was shocked at the people working in the clinic… they weren’t evil, they were normal people doing their jobs with a smile on their faces. I did the paperwork, then waited, then saw a counselor, then waited, then went back and changed, and waited, then had the ultrasound/finger prick, and waited, then finally it was time. I only had Valium and Tylenol for pain, and didn’t need anything else, I didn’t even have a “recovery” period. I moved on with my life. Until the next unexpected pregnancy and the next, both of which ended the exact same way.
Yes I have had three successful abortions, which were all for me. I was not ready or willing to be pregnant at that time of my life and I am glad that I had the choice to have 3 healthy, successful and uneventful abortions. I wish my body were different and that when I didn’t want children birth control would not fail, but the abortions were the best thing that I could have done.
What about now? Well I’m 7 months pregnant with a little girl. I am as thankful for the choice to have this much wanted child as I was to have the abortions. My marriage DID NOT suffer because of the abortions. Were there complications? guilty feelings associated with this pregnancy? HELL NO! Choice makes the difference and I AM NOT SORRY.
