Wow, first of all I would like to say that I wish I knew about this website sooner. I went to Planned Parenthood last week for my annual and that’s where I found out about it. I’d like to start off by saying that I have never been sorry about my decision to have an abortion but it is nice to read other stories and realize that I was not alone in my decision.
Many of the stories I have been reading talk about being in love and making that decision with their lover. My story is slightly different. Mine is about being a stupid teenager who thought she was invincible.
When I was younger I had very low self-esteem and the attention I received from men (well, they were boys at the time) made me feel better about myself. So when I was fifteen, I had unprotected sex at a party. I missed my period but didn’t really think anything of it. I was still young so my period being irregular didn’t really surprise me. Then I missed another period. I decided to go to Planned Parenthood to get an STD test and was not planning on getting a pregnancy test. I knew I was pregnant but was afraid of admitting it. However, upon telling them my period was late, they automatically gave me the test.
When they got the results, they took me back into a room and told me the results. I knew what they were before they told me and was of course devastated. They counseled me and explained my options. The women asked if I had any idea what I wanted to do (saying that she could talk about everything but couldn’t give me any advice). I told her I was keeping the baby because I couldn’t give my child up for adoption and I was against abortion. At first I told a couple of friends and the father. Right away he told me that he thought I should have an abortion.
I didn’t know what to think anymore. All I knew was I was missing much of my tenth grade year in high school because I was violently sick every single morning. I either didn’t go to school or left early because I couldn’t handle it anymore. I told my mom who told my dad. I’m a daddy’s girl and was so afraid to disappoint him that I just couldn’t tell him myself. My mom told me that they would support any decision I made but that they thought it would be best if I had an abortion.
I finally decided that an abortion was the best choice for me. Part of it was selfishness. I didn’t want to give up my entire life. I had so much going for myself. I was a great student and athlete. But most of it was my concern for the baby. I was no way ready, financially or emotionally, to raise a child.
My mom helped me make an appointment at a local clinic. Unfortunately, I was later in my pregnancy then most abortions take place. Mostly because I was too afraid in the beginning to take the test. Four days after my sixteenth birthday, I walked into the clinic. Of course, there were protestors but I wasn’t worried about what they have to say. I’m not going to explain the procedure because most every other story explains it. Yes there was a small degree of pain and there was a nurse holding my hand the whole time. I was however, upset that my mother couldn’t be in there with me because of insurance purposes. I was still a child and very much afraid.
The decision to have an abortion was the best decision I have ever made. I lost some friends over it. But the way I figure it, if they were really my friends they would have been their when I needed them the most. Instead, they abandoned me. I still run into protestors when I go to Planned Parenthood for my Depo shot or my annual. Many times I laugh as I walk by them because I think about my experience. Before my experience, I was totally against abortion. People need to realize that they don’t really know what they would do until they are put in this situation.
