I had my abortion when I was 22 years old. I was single, had my own place, worked full time putting myself through junior college. I was an honor student and was banking on this to achieve my goal of getting into a prestigious university. I was very educated about birth control use and scrupulously careful about using it. However, one day I found myself pregnant. The birth control had not worked. At this time, I knew two women my age who had also gotten pregnant. They were opting to carry to term because their boyfriends were promising marriage and support. I was highly skeptical of this and sure enough their boyfriends vanished. My boyfriend vanished too. I had some savings and no health insurance, so you know what happened to the savings.
I intuitively knew I was pregnant before lab tests revealed it. For one thing, I was sick as a dog.My honor student grades nose dived. I knew I was going to get an abortion, no question about it. I was in such a tailspin over being pregnant that I couldn’t think straight and thought that abortion was illegal, even though it was legal. However, if it had been illegal, I was fully prepared to go the knitting needle route. Meanwhile, my two pregnant peers were applying for welfare and subsidized housing. I was aghast; I thought they had thrown their lives away. Watching them made me even more convinced that I was making the right decision.
Some years later, I happened to run into one of the women who had decided to have a baby. She was living off welfare. I was in the prestigious university I had worked so hard for.
By the age of 13, I decided I was never going to have children. I have never had the desire to be a parent and have withstood many years of accusations of being “selfish” and “immature” and downright hostility. I find it interesting that all these accusations come from people with children. I am 50 years old now and have never regretted having that abortion. Never.
I have spent 10 years volunteering at clinics, escorting women past the pious hypocrites who harass them because they want an abortion. I call them hypocrites because over the years, I have come to find out that many of the anti-abortion women have had abortions too. Suddenly, it’s different when they find themselves between a rock and a hard place. Now we are perilously close to criminalizing abortion because too many women think this won’t happen, or it’s an issue that won’t concern them. All women need to realize that a government that imposes restrictions and bans on abortion is a government that will also take their birth control away. It’s a government that is contemptuous of women and returning us to second class citizens. Think about it, if you don’t have birth control and abortions, what choices do you have?
