My name is Ashley, I’m 19 years old, and back in October, I had a surgical abortion at age 18. My boyfriend and I had been together for 7 months. I had never been in love with someone more in my life. We had gotten engaged in July, and were to be married on Valentines Day. Sometime around the beginning of August, we started talking about having a baby after our honeymoon. It was going to be perfect, or so I thought.
My boyfriend and I had a terrible breakup in the beginning of October. We didn’t speak, the law was involved and I was absolutely devastated. The one person I had ever thought of spending my life with was gone, and I was alone.
My cousin decided it was time for me to get out of the house and stop moping, so she took me to a local football game to get him off my mind. I wasn’t feeling good for days before that, but I thought it was depression setting in, so I thought nothing of it.
We picked up a friend of ours, who was 7 months pregnant at the time, and she had asked me what was wrong. I told her my symptoms and she immediately said, “Ashley, I think your’e pregnant.”
My mom and I have a good relationship, so I only lasted 3 days before I had to break down and tell her. She immediately became irate. After about 10 minutes of screaming, yelling and crying, she calmed down and we talked about my options.
That’s when it hit me. I’m 18 years old, a sophomore in college for criminal justice, $4,000 in debt without my student loans added in, and I’m not responsible. I am not suitable to have this baby. I asked my mom what she would think if I had an abortion. She handed me the phone book and said, “I know you don’t want to, but I think it’s the best option”. I called the clinic closest to my home, and set up an appointment, and before I knew it, it was here.
I pulled up to the clinic that was flooded with protestors. Posters, pictures, and chanting filled the area. As I got out of my car, I had rocks, bottles, sticks, and other projectiles thrown at me. They just kept yelling “Baby Killer!” as I walked towards the door. I began to cry uncontrollably. When I got inside, I had to sit through a counseling session, blood work, and about an hour and a half of paper work. I decided to go into “Twilight Sleep” during the procedure, which would only take 10 minutes. In the waiting room afterwards, I felt a sense of relief, I knew I did the right thing.
My cousin also knew I did the right thing. She took me out that night, and helped me get my mind off of the procedure.
Today, I am a healthy 19 year old. I’m still in college and I have not once regretted my decision. Today in my Oral Communications class, someone is giving a speech on being pro-life, with graphic photos and videos to go along. Make sure I’ll be the first with questions and comments after this speech. I will never regret or hate myself for my descision; I know my baby would have thanked me for it.
Thanks for letting me share with you all. You’re not alone, and never EVER be ashamed at your choice. After all, we are the writers of our own life story, never let anyone try and write it for you.
