I was 25 in 1985 and had been dating this guy for about two years. In the past, I always made sure I knew if the guy I was dating was pro-life or not, so that I would know if I could count on him or not. Call me a pessimist, but I did think this way. I knew too many people who got pregnant and then got married. My sister did that scenario at 17 and lived in an abusive situation for many years after that. Not for me. I did not want to be dependent for any reason.
So here I am 25 years old, (old enough to know better) and I let my
boyfriend talk me into getting off the pill because it wasn't good for
me and that he would take responsibility for birth control. Ladies, if
this ever happens to you run! I don't think it was 2-3 months later I
ended up pregnant. Apparently he didn't like condoms as much as he
thought. Not only that, but our relationship was becoming verbally
abusive. Looking back, I think he thought it was his way to keep me
when the relationship started going bad. But I am not like most women,
abortion was the only option.
I was nauseous almost immediately; it didn't take a rocket scientist to
know what was wrong. I remember him being mad at me because he wanted
to go out and celebrate his new job and all I wanted to do is go home
because I felt sick. I made an appointment with my gynecologist to
have it taken care of. I knew he did them because my best friend had one done before and we had the same doctor. I never asked my boyfriend if he wanted the baby, our discussion was about what I wanted. Since I was a student, I was broke and didn't really like kids; it was a no-brainer. It was done in the doctor's office and I was told to bring $400 cash! It was done in two steps, the first day I went in and had something inserted into my uterus to make it dilate, and the next day I went in and had that parasite vacuumed out. My only medication was 5 mg of Valium. I drove myself home even though my friend went with me. My boyfriend did pay for the procedure; however he was not there for me. He had started a new job, out of town, so was not there for any kind of support other than the financial end.
Our relationship grew worse and looking back on it I wonder how I put
Up with that for so long. He was just like his dad, even though he hated how his dad treated his mother. Because I did have the abortion I finished school and currently work at a hospital in a good career. If I had had the baby, I probably would have gotten married to this man, quit school and stayed in an abusive situation much longer than I did, for the sake of the child. Today, I am a healthy, well adjusted,
confident and competent woman who still has no kids. At age 29, when I
was still single, I had a tubal so that would never happen again. I
haven't regretted any of it yet.
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