My husband and I had only been married for a little over a year when I found out I was pregnant. We knew we had a choice to make and for about a week we discussed all of our options and talked about what we each thought was the best choice. We decided together that it was not the right time to have a child. We strongly believe that it takes time as well as hard work to build a strong marriage, which we believe is important to have before having a child, and that since we had been married only a short time, we were not ready for that responsibility.
Also, we have always said that we wanted to adopt an older child, rather than having our own children. When I became pregnant we began to reconsider whether or not we wanted to have our own child as well. However, we decided that we had made that decision very conscientiously and did not want to reverse it in the spur of the moment. So, we decided to have the abortion and, if after time, we still feel that we want to have children we will do it the right way, when we are prepared and ready for the responsibility.
When we went to the clinic for the abortion I was scared of what it would be like and upset because I (as probably most women do) never thought I would be in that position. But everyone at the clinic was very warm, friendly, and reassuring. They really understood what I was going through and that I was scared and made me very comfortable. I was sedated during the procedure so I don't remember anything about the actual abortion. I felt fine in the recovery room but felt sick to my stomach on the way home and had cramps. My husband was wonderful to me throughout the whole thing. When we got home he went and got me a heating pad to put on my stomach and soup and I took a nap. When I woke up I felt much better. I did not have any more pain and only had very light bleeding that day. The entire experience was much easier than I expected.
As I have said, my husband has been extremely supportive. We definitely went through the experience together, which made it much easier and has made our relationship stronger. I was pretty open about telling my family and friends that I am close to about the abortion. In doing so, I found out that several family members and friends have had abortions before and had not told me about it and I found a lot of support in that.
One of my sisters did not react well and as of right now is not speaking to me. However, I do not regret telling her. The choice of when or if to have a child is my choice to make and I don't have anything to be ashamed of. I feel that anyone who is close to me should be able to accept that. It is hard not having her support but I have hope that one day she will come around.
I am very glad that I made the decision to have an abortion. I knew in my heart, and still know, that it was right for myself and for my husband. I do wish that I had been more careful about using protection, but I also know that everyone makes mistakes. You can't change them, you can only learn from them. I am definitely not sorry.
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