We were only dating a couple months. We were going to college and attempting to break out and make it in life as individuals, instead of as children. But ultimately we were 19, we were just kids. I had always been pro-choice, much to the complete disgust of my family, but faced with the choice I didn’t know what to do. It went unsaid between us for a while, and I honestly don’t remember who brought it up first. But we both had a look of relief in our eyes when we agreed that we just couldn’t have it. The process was horrible. We were in the middle of the Bible belt and the protestors outside spit on our car. All the girls in the clinic that day were treated like cattle, like we were heartless. I was in tears when I left. There were ‘valets’ to go get our cars so we didn’t have to walk through the protestors. One was a elderly man, with a sparkle in his eyes. He told me I was ok; he gave me a hug and reassured my fears and doubts. I have never seen him again, but in that very accepting moment he touched my soul.
My then boyfriend, now husband and I, have since had two beautiful kids, a 3 year old girl and a 5 month old son. Only those I knew would support me have been told about it. I’m not sorry. I would do it again. There was not a single thing about us at that time that was ready for a family. Having the abortion then does not make me love my kids less now, and I don’t ever look back at what could have been. We have created a beautiful family, and I can devote all the energy I need into my kids instead of trying to scramble for a sense of self, which is an amazing feeling.
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