I'm 19 years old and I come from a strict Italian family. It's always been said in my family "Marriage before children". Well, the first time I found out I was pregnant I was 18 and it was with my current boyfriend. At the time we were only together a month and we had unprotected sex (I knew him for 6 years so I figured it would be ok). With my previous boyfriend of two years I had unprotected sex and never got pregnant so I figured hey, it won’t happen to me, right? WRONG! I was getting sick a lot and feeling lousy and I noticed my period was late. I took two home pregnancy tests and they came out positive. I told my mother immediately and she FLIPPED OUT! She told me that I was too immature to have a baby and it would be unfair to myself, my boyfriend and my child to actually have it. I fought and cried and i was completely stressed out for the whole two weeks. I called an abortion clinic made the appointment and waited for the day. The day of the abortion I was a nervous wreck, my anxiety was at an all time high and I was shaking. The people at the clinic were very nice and made me feel comfortable but I was still nervous. I lay on the bed and next thing I can remember I woke up and they wheeled me into a recovery room. I felt relief and I was a little bit sad but more happy that it was over. The next day I was up and about going to school.
About 3 months later I got pregnant again. I was on birth control and I had no idea why I was pregnant again. My mother was in an uproar but again she was there for me and I decided that abortion again was the right choice for me. Same thing as the first except this time i was sedated instead of put to sleep. I remember the nurse holding my hand and talking to me and in two minutes it was over. I was completely sure I was not going to have sex again and I didn’t for a while.
About 4 months later (now actually) I found out I’m pregnant again. This time I was considering trying to have the baby but my boyfriend told me the same things he told me the first two times--"WE ARENT READY!" I’m ashamed that I’m pregnant again—-yes, because I feel embarrassed that I had sex again unprotected but I’m not really ashamed about having another abortion. I’m nervous, of course, but that’s just a normal thing to go through. This time that made me really say “hey, I have to do this again” is because I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and I was told that with all the treatment I’m going to be needing with cost and with the rest that I’ll need I should not have a baby any time soon. Maybe if I didn’t have MS I would have this baby but there is no maybe. I won’t be having sex after this next abortion just because it’s not something I HAVE to do. But to girls my age out there who are going through the same thoughts and feelings, I’m telling you that I do not regret any of my decisions. You will know the right decision for you and in the end you will be happy.
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