Melissa’s Story

The anniversary of my abortion is coming up; it will be three years on March 16th of this year, 2005. For three years, I have felt guilty, sad, lonely, and angry about my abortion. I blamed my mother, moyfriend, and my health practitioners for encouraging me to get an abortion, and for not talking me out of it. I thought that I was a poor victim of abortion, that I would always feel a black stain on my soul because I had an abortion. I felt unlovable, and I felt like God would never forgive me for what I have done. I spent months after my abortion torturing myself on pro-life websites.
Now that I have found this website today, I ask myself, why did I feel this way? I know realize it is because society tells me to. Because women are supposed to feel regret for having an abortion, because they are supposed to redeem themselves and make up for what they have done. They are supposed to feel selfish for what they have done. Well, I am sick of all of that! I had lost several friends for having an abortion, and now I have two of them back in my life. I didn’t have to justify what I did when they came back in my life, they just moved on with our friendship, and I know they are sorry for abandoning me when I needed them the most. I think I felt guilty for having an abortion because of what other people would think of me. Now, I know that I could never have raised a child at that time in my life. I don’t have to justify my decision to anyone; I don’t have to have excuses why I did it. I don’t want to blame people for forcing me into an abortion anymore. Of my own free will, I did it! I had many reasons to do so, and I made my own choice. I am not sorry that I considered my future and my own life when I made this decision, I am just sorry that I didn’t stumble onto your website sooner, since it could have saved me years of guilt and sadness. But right now, I feel like I have had an epiphany! I am one of the millions of women who have had an abortion. And I am not sorry that I will no longer remain silent!